#Question: What is a consequence of the late diagnosis of autism?

<EditorsNote> I’m on a mission to further the conversation for people who are late diagnosed with Autism. Thus, I’m asking a lot of questions … here are some of the answers … This one came from my friend Jackie. </EditorsNote>

Question: What is a consequence of the late diagnosis of autism?

Jackie: “You know, I used to be pretty jaded, thinking everyone just chose to get me wrong on purpose. It was super frustrating because I'm actually pretty good with words, so it blew my mind that people seemed to always assume the worst about me. Especially when I thought about my job history—I mean, I was literally paid to chat up strangers in marketing, and I even aced an employment tribunal with a bunch of folks lined up against me. The panel got me just fine.

It made me feel like maybe I was just unlucky, always running into folks who couldn't vibe with my way of talking. Sounds a bit full of myself, I know, but I was grasping at straws before I knew about my autism.

Thing is, in formal settings, I'm like a fish in water. But throw me into a casual hangout? Total fish out of water. I tried so hard to be crystal clear, to lay out every thought in hopes of making sense to others, but it just never panned out. Ended up totally fed up and feeling defeated.

Not knowing I was autistic really did a number on me. It's like, you go through life pushing yourself too hard, ignoring your own needs until you hit burnout. Then, everything just feels more intense, stuff you used to handle just fine suddenly feels impossible.

I ended up in this place where I was either really hard on myself or just couldn't stand people. And instead of reaching out, I'd just dive deeper into my hobbies and interests, totally missing out on friendships because I was too wrapped up in my own world.

Finding out about my autism later in life was tough. It meant I'd been struggling without a clue why, blaming myself for everything. But it's not all doom and gloom.

On the flip side, understanding autism now is way different than it was back in the day. I often wonder how things might have been different if I'd been diagnosed as a kid. Probably would've been stuck in a totally different school track.

But the best part? Finding my tribe. Us autistic folks, we don't just jump to the worst conclusions about each other. And at work, where everyone's on the spectrum, it's a whole different vibe—less nonsense, more straight talk.

We can chat about anything, from politics to personal interests, without it turning into a big drama. It's like, our conversations are just richer and more varied. Just the other day, we went from discussing caste systems and mental health history to family dynamics and environmental conservation. And yeah, sometimes it's about Thomas the Tank Engine or Disney movies.

Honestly, I wouldn't trade all that depth for the world, not even for the "normal" chit-chat I once thought I wanted. It's been such a relief to realize I'm not a bad person, just misunderstood. Knowing I'm autistic has changed everything. I just wish I'd figured it out sooner, so I wouldn't have been so hard on myself or others.