12 Reasons I get Unfollowed

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Mikedelic

1. simple miscommunications ("--please dont proposition me it's creepy"   "--i didnt ask you to marry me i just said i wanted to finger you")

2. making insulting tweets at new followers who are clearly just marketing something and have no real interest in my awesome tweets ("dear new follower, @toysonline -- thank you for follwing me.  i hope you get aids and catch on fire.")

3. fallings out between friends because of honesty ("--not that i'm saying you're shallow, but only tweeting about 4square and what you are currently eating is really annoying and you should up your game a little for the good of the team kthx")

4. sharing politically charged links with people whose politics differ radically from mine. 

5. death threats

6. hatin on popular stuff that i hate ("i hope justin bieber has her period on stage and everyone makes fun of her and then they dump pig blood on her at homecoming (cont.)..."   "...(cont.) but that she lacks the telekinetic powers necessary to take violent revenge upon her antagonists")

7. scaring off chicks who at first think i am quirky but then think i am creepy ("-- thank you for following me, we are best friends now.  maybe this seems a little forward, but someday i will meet you in real life and finger you.")
 
8. making fun of the world cup ("i hope soccer gets aids and catches on fire")

9. goatserolling

10. making referential jokes that are offensive to people who are not familiar with stuff that almost everybody else seems to know about and be riffing on ("i will respond to your tweet about the yummy noms you had for snacksies, but you will blow me first.")

11. using the same jokes/imagery too much ("i hope you get aids from being fingered and catch on fire")

12. tweeting too much

~~lessons i have learned~~

1. dont talk to chicks about fingering them until you are right about to do it
2. justin bieber is actually a boy
3. a lot of stupid people like dumb soccer


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