#NerdsUnite: F4M - craigslist date, anyone? anyone?

Editor’s Note: Nerds, meet Natalie. She currently has a personal ad up on Craigslist. Like seriously – craigslist. She just had her first date from her ad, and she is here to share it with you all … HIT IT NATALIE!!!

#TalkNerdyToMeLover’s Natalie Ochoa

My first time meeting someone off Craigslist was actually phenomenal. I was so surprised.

Jose responded to my post after a few days. His response was long and filled with heart-felt emotion. You could tell he had been through it some. His writing was beautiful and he was literate and intelligent. (The responses I had been getting previously were more of the ilk of men who just wanted my picture and wanting to know if I was ready to be a sex maniac.)

He also said he had over 15,000 songs in his Ipod. This appealed to me on so many levels. I wrote that I was a self-described music fiend, so figured and was overjoyed that he was an even bigger music fiend than I, which seemed pretty unbelievable. I was interested. He sent a picture. I had never before dated a Hispanic guy. I am mixed Hispanic and white, but for some reason, never went for the machismo of Mexican men. But he appeared nerdy and not my usual type. Not that I really have a type. Duh, as if “likes me” is a type.

I figured if nothing changes, nothing changes, so I wrote back. We emailed each other for a few days. I am a pretty busy person. I do a lot of things with friends, work two part-time jobs and am busy most nights. But, I was determined to answer each response and try to keep them all straight. Keeping the likes and pertinent information organized for fifteen men is a tall order. But, Jose was persistent. He kept answering also, even when I would forget to answer for a few days.

Finally, through all the pleasantries and him appearing interested in something other than sex, we exchanged phone numbers. I said I would text him when I got some time, but he ended up texting me first.

I was visiting my mom’s house when he first sent me a text. I am a master at texting and love the ability to still get on with life and be with people, while being able to hold up an informal conversation through a few lines at a time. We chatted for a while. I found out he likes doing lists, so prompted a few lists for him to do – music, movies, etc. He told me about moving from Washington and his divorce. He answered anything I asked. He was an open book.

I ended up taking my niece for a walk around the neighborhood. I was describing what we were seeing on our walk. I described flowers, sounds, trees, and people I saw out and about. He was relating. Then we just shared a moment, where we were both got caught up in nostalgia for childhood and the beauty of life when it was new. And it was nice to share a moment with someone. That was when he ceased being a stranger.

We met later that night. He kind of challenged me to do it. I was dead tired after driving back from my mom’s house. He kept urging, “Come on, you are young, you can drink coffee.” I whined a little about taking a nap and that I would have to get ready. But, I thought his insistence was flattering. So, I got ready and went.

Earlier, I asked him if he was the Craigslist killer. He balked and said that I could Google him. I actually did Google him. He is a writer and has a website reviewing horror movies, which seemed edgy to me. I also found what I thought was his Myspace page, which is a funny story for later. But, he seemed harmless enough. I amazingly worked up the nerve to go meet a total stranger in LA. This was unusual for me.

I asked him to meet me half way. That was when I found out he didn’t have a car. I told him that if we hadn’t had such a great text conversation earlier, I would not have responded to him anymore. Which in my head, I was thinking, “Wow, dude, no car? What, you expect me to drive all the time? Ugh!” But, I figured what harm could it do to meet him? Also, he would be a good guy with which to start this whole dating process. I was willing to meet this nerdy guy with encyclopedic knowledge of music and films.

I was not sure what to expect. I felt nervous, but he seemed more nervous than me. I was worried that conversation would lag, especially because my head is known to go blank when I get nervous. He said he wouldn’t let that happen. And he didn’t.

Jose was a little awkward and anxious, but could definitely hold a conversation. I was impressed. I love brains. I love book guys. I love nerds. A good time to me is listening to someone without arrogance, expound on why they loved the last installment from their favorite author or comparing why one genre excels another.

We drank coffee, we smoked, and we talked. It was amazing. I was completely absorbed in hearing him talk. I was almost intimidated. I got over it, but it was thrilling. We ended up walking around a park for a few hours. We walked and discussed everything from favorite bands to bible verses and spirituality. Then, we sat for a while and told each other about our families and our pasts.

I saw in that night, how fun dating can be, and the joy of getting to know a truly remarkable person. Too bad, they all were not like this first one.