Fun with #OKCupid: Oh, sweet sweet irony
<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Jason. We’re buds in social media and he too is a lover of online dating. He just had a rather “inneresting” experience this past weekend. I only have one more thing left to say … HIT IT JASON!! </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover’s Jason King
A few weeks ago I (32m) found a girl on OKC (21-25f) that lives in St. Louis a few blocks from where I work, and we hit it off. After the 2nd night of chatting, we met up at a bar after work, and basically talked for 3 hours and got kinda drunk together. Nothing happens that night, but we start texting each other more and more, and a few days later (last friday night) she ends up driving to my house (about 30 minute drive) to hang out. She doesn’t at all seem like the type to randomly sleep with a guy, and I liked her enough not to push the issue, but after my friends left (i was having a small house party) we ended up on the couch kissing. After about 20 minutes (it was about 3am) of a good makeout session, she basically says she wants to ‘continue this’ some other time, and that she needed to get home because it was so late. Understandable.
Catch is, we were already planning on spending the next day in the city together, and I basically had to wait for her to get off work around 2pm, go pick her up, etc. And she said that if she didn’t get up early enough, she’d have to work later (it’s a work program at the university she goes to) and that’d just postpone us hooking up.
So come 1pm, she says she’s going to have to stay later, until about 3pm. Doesn’t text.. Come 4pm, she says they had a bit of a drama at work, and she has to stay with a patient until a doctor shows up and it could be hours.
Fast forward to 9pm, she finally texts me and said she just got out of there, but she’s so exhausted she wanted to take a rain check. BUT then goes on to say ‘fyi, my ex has been texting and calling a lot and before I met you we were talking about getting back together. If we’re out and I get weird texts I just wanted to let you know what’s going on because now that I met you, I’m having 2nd thoughts about getting back with him”.
So, just a few weeks before we talked, I basically said goodbye to a girl I really liked. We dated for a few months (found each other on OKC too) and ended up knowing a lot of the same people. It was a pretty nice situation. We really liked each other. Sex was Fantastic! But she got a job halfway across the country where she applied at school and she had set all this up before we met. I basically told her I would miss her but I really didn’t have the wherewithal to do a LDR at this point. We say our good byes, and twice now she’s driven back here for the weekend.
Honestly, I think she’s feeling regretful for moving because even though I’ve told her I didn’t want to keep trying she knows I didn’t want her to leave and only broke things off because she moved. (she’s not moving back any time soon).
So, here I am with new girl, things are going good. We go out on another date 2 nights ago. I picked her up outside her apartment, we went to a local bar she wanted to go to, and we basically sat and talked for a few hours (repeat of the first night). As the night was ending, we agreed to see each other again Friday and as I was pulling up to her apartment and she was getting ready to get out, she leaned over, ON HER OWN, and kissed me. Not just on the cheek, but pulled me in and gave me about a 10 second makeout kiss and then hopped out saying ‘see you friday’ with a grin.
Thursday is her busy day at school, so she’s said thursdays are generally out of the question, but last week she still texted me quote a bit. Last evening (the following thursday) we had sent a few texts and she even said she was looking forward for tonight. Then, for the rest of evening… nothing. Like from 8pm on. I had sent a text warning about ice on the ground (i saw a few people slip and fall already) and no replies.. nothing, UNTIL 1am when she texts me
“So, my ex decided that he’s going to drive into town, and he’s going to stay for the weekend. I don’t think we can hang out tomorrow.”
WTF? First, I’m half asleep and this shit woke me up. Second, WTF? My ex had literally said she wanted to drive into town this weekend to see me, and I SAID NO. I didn’t say why, just that I was too busy and it’d be a waste of her time, but she basically called BS and now thinks it’s because somebody else is in the picture. Third, WTF?
My only response to her text was ‘for real?’ and she replied ‘Yea I didn’t know he was planning this until now’.
I haven’t replied back. I don’t know IF I will even reply. It’s like, I halfway appreciate the honesty, but I really don’t appreciate being canceled on, and I most certainly don’t appreciate being canceled on ‘because of some other dude’. My excitement to see her tonight is replaced with jealousy and bad thoughts about her hooking up with another guy.
The only thing I can think to text her right now is something questioning her judgement and integrity, so I’m just biting my lip and not saying anything. I like this girl, a lot and I’m feeling uncomfortably jealous right now. I signed up for OkCupid to find a girl that I’d be jealous if she was with another guy. That’s expected. I just didn’t want to actually feel jealous. I’m not a jealous person and I don’t like being made to feel jealous.
/rant. Back to work I guess.
