• Home
  • About
  • Posts
    • Autism
    • Synesthesia
    • Unbelievably True Adventures
    • Body Language Expert
  • Press
Talk Nerdy To Me®

Type and hit Enter to search

  • Home
  • About
  • Posts
    • Autism
    • Synesthesia
    • Unbelievably True Adventures
    • Body Language Expert
  • Press
General

Fun with #OkCupid: My date with a 94% enemy

March 4, 2012 7 Mins Read
233 Views
0 Comments

Oh goodness gracious, what a night. Hold on, I need a song to go with the post. I promise, no Nickelback … 

So, after I conducted the 103 dates in 9 months, I swore up, down, left, and right to how good the OKC algorithm is at matching people but that chemistry and those “butterflies” can only truly come from when you meet someone who has a quality that you resonate with. I went out with 103 people (one female), out of that I had 11 second dates, 6 guys I slept with, and 4 that I wanted more from. Of those 4, I wound up picking the ONLY 4 that were emotionally unavailable. What in me resonated with that quality in a person? Albeit, the speed in which I picked up on said emotional unavailability did grow over time. The first guy took me two weeks, second guy took me a week, third guy took me two dates, fourth guy I spotted immediately on the first date. 

I had a compatibility prerequisite that I never published (85% match or more), and I’ve since been asked how good can the algorithm be if I’m still single? 

That’s the thing though, dating has less to do with the other person and more to do with you and what qualities you are attracted to in a person. I now have a modern day shaman who is guiding me through my own issues as to not keep repeating history – but I’m doing a lot of self work now (hence why I also haven’t been publishing as much of my dating life as in real time anymore). 

Clearly if you’ve dated half of Los Angeles over the last two years and you’re still single – there’s something funky going on in that noggin. 

I’m ferociously analytical, fiercely passionate about this site – and adore meeting new people. 

One thing I had yet to do though with my time spent on OKC was to go out on a date with anyone less than about 80%. Mostly just out of my own lack of interest in even wasting my time with someone that I was so off with on core principles, but like any good scientist you have to measure out all of the variables. How could I with 100% conviction swear by the algorithm if I had yet to test the enemy percentage as well as the match. 

On Friday, I was on my way to kick it with a good friend – and as I was sitting at the bus stop I checked OKC and I saw this message …

Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.00.21 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE writers!! Like, writers make me weak in the KNEES!!! 

I checked his profile, dug his pics – and then noticed just how UNBELIEVABLY mismatched we were …

Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.02.10 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

ZERO percent friend and 94% enemy. 

Wow. Wow. Wow. 

Instead of ignoring the message I decided now was as good of a time as any to test the algorithm. Who knows, maybe my ENTIRE approach was wrong and maybe opposites do attract! 

I was intrigued and excited … he included his name and phone number in the email so I sent him a quick text. 

He got right back to me and we planned to meet up at the Roger Room at 7 yesterday. 

Waking up yesterday morning, however, I got a text saying the following … (stupid screen capture isn’t working. I hate you droid charge!!) 

Him: Just to clarify, I am actually on the site for dating not to be a test subject or column fodder. 🙂 capiche? 

Me: Im a writer so nothing in my life is ever off limits. I dont name names and no longer document datng in real time.

Him: Fair enough

Me: Still good to go?

Him: Yes, just leave the webcam at home. 

I then hopped on the bus and headed over to the Roger Room later that evening. The bus was a little late so I started to text him saying that I was going to be about 10 mins behind, and as I was doing so he was already texting me indicating that he as well was running late. 

Score one point for courtesy.

This might not be so bad afterall, I thought. 

I then get to the Roger Room and sit at the bar ordering a Bellinni. (Which was so stupid since I hadn’t had dinner and champagne goes straight to your head.) 

After sitting for another 10 minutes alone he hit the “20 minute late mark” which means you have now granted me full right to live tweet about my experience … 

Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.12.49 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.15.37 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.15.48 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.16.05 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

He then arrived, so I put my droid away. 

We sat in a little nook in the back and began talking. 

I get asked all the time about how exhausting it must be to date so much, as there are only so many “getting to know you questions” but I always explain to people that because of what I do as a lifecaster and because of the online dating medium in general being so transparent, you pretty much already know those things about the person so you can move onto the meat of the convo. 

This has been the case with my matches 80% or higher. With a 94% enemy, I felt like I was on a job interview. 

PLEASE FILL OUT THE FOLLOWING:

Name?

Birthplace?

Siblings?

Parents still together?

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

The conversation just felt so stunted and unnatural. I was SO FREAKING OPEN but kept feeling like I was pulling things out of him, and since I’m naturally not an inquisitive person, it was just … weird. 

We didn’t have anything really in common, outside of writing – and he didn’t really get out of his shell until we started to talk about movies (his interest). 

I then finished my drink, ordered another (it feels like bad form to just grab one SINGLE drink with someone), and continued to talk about movies since it was such a passion of his. 

Then, I made the mistake of asking the one question you should never ask a movie lover … 

Me: So, what’s your favorite movie? 

Quickly realizing I committed a movie mortal sin, I backpedaled and said – no, wait, top 5. 

Him: How could I ever choose a favorite, or 5?

Oh dear god, I thought … quiet Friel … just stay calm and it will all be over soon.

I sipped my drink giving me something to do while he started rattling off his favorite movies based on each genre since you could never compare the awesomeness of You’ve Got Mail to Citizen Kane (true story, those were both on his list).  

Then after the second drink was over I mentioned that I was going to meet up with my friend (which was the honest truth, hence why we were meeting so early in the first place), he walked me out even offering to give me a ride to the next bar (since I had told him that I take public transportation). I thanked him profusely but explained that I live life with the “journey is the destination” mentality and I never know what I could get into along the way. 

He smiled, and thanked me for my time and hoped to see me again.

I genuinely liked the guy – he’s great, I’m totes not mad at it, but he made me appreciate SO MUCH the algorithm and how FREAKING IMPORTANT it is at dating someone with the same general approach to life as yourself; the conversation flows soooooooo much better and easier. 

Many blessings to my 94% enemy. Again, he’s a great guy, but not for me. 

Well done, OKC. Well done. 

#thatisall

Are you on OKC? Me too! Send me a message!

Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.48.31 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 3.43.38 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 3.43.56 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 3.44.14 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 3.44.25 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.36.42 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.36.58 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 1.56.41 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Screen shot 2012 03 04 at 3.42.28 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

Tags:

fun with okcupidjen frielnerd talktalk nerdytalk nerdy to metalk nerdy to me lover

Share Article

Other Articles

Screen shot 2012 03 02 at 12.57.37 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®
Previous

#NerdsUnite: Straight shooting with @mcarmona1(get to it!)

Photo on 2012 03 07 at 08.19 Talk Nerdy To Me®
Next

#Adventures in Adventuring: Life lessons learned from a crack head

Next
Photo on 2012 03 07 at 08.19 Talk Nerdy To Me®
March 7, 2012

#Adventures in Adventuring: Life lessons learned from a crack head

Previews
March 2, 2012

#NerdsUnite: Straight shooting with @mcarmona1(get to it!)

Screen shot 2012 03 02 at 12.57.37 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

No Comment! Be the first one.

    Leave a Reply Cancel reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

    Hi, I’m Jen Friel

    & I’d like to personally welcome you to my home
    Talk Nerdy To Me.®

    I’m autistic (late diagnosed) and have a lot of different forms of synesthesia (making my life unusually interesting). 

    Instagram Facebook Twitter Youtube

    Featured Posts

    11864805 10100873076569489 7874067153814933141 o Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #TalkNerdyToMe: The full story behind our @BritneySpears moment

    Screen Shot 2023 08 08 at 8.23.35 AM Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #TrueStory: I met and talked to Sharon Stone about Synesthesia (*pinch me*)

    Screen Shot 2023 03 28 at 8.03.34 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #TrueStory: I Used Synesthesia to “Out” Con a Conman

    hyperlexia dyslexic synesthesia autistic

    #RealDeal: I’m autistic with hyperlexia, synesthesia, and I’m dyslexic (here’s what that means)

    Screen Shot 2023 03 15 at 4.01.38 PM Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #Fact: Jamie Lee Curtis won an Oscar on Sunday and showed up to her bestie Sharon Stone’s art show on Tuesday

    Related Posts

    2011 12 222013.05.42 Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #WTF: About the last 48 hours … Can I get a rundown? (macbook pro retina, Aston Martin, monogamy, slave)

    December 29, 2012
    314772 423349271036919 1396863120 n 1 2 Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #NerdsUnite: My name is Alicia and I’m doing 50 dates in 50 states (North Dakota)

    December 28, 2012
    eric carillo tntml 2 Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #NerdsUnite: Social Dynamics Lesson 2 (Non-Committal Body Language)

    December 27, 2012
    chelofthesea Talk Nerdy To Me®

    #NerdUnite: Today, I will squeeze my loved ones a little tighter

    December 17, 2012
    Talk Nerdy To Me®

    Talk Nerdy To Me® is an intimate and intelligent perspective on what it is like to be diagnosed with Autism and Synesthesia late in life. 

    Talk Nerdy To Me®

    • Home
    • About
    • Contact
    • Media
    • FAQ

    Category

    • Autism
    • Synesthesia
    • Unbelievably True Adventures
    • Body Language

    Follow Us

    Facebook Twitter Instagram

    304 S. Jones Blvd #1209

    Las Vegas, Nevada 89107

    (702) 530-2789

    Talk Nerdy To Me® by: Jen Friel | All Rights Reserved

    • Home
    • About
    • Posts
      • Autism
      • Synesthesia
      • Unbelievably True Adventures
      • Body Language Expert
    • Press