<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Leah. She’s pretty rad and has an INCREDIBLY random life. Like, no – for reals … did you know she has an obsession with vampires, psychics, and tarot card readers … and she had more sex as a teenager than in her 30s … anddddd she even had two ex boyfriends die violently – one from a heroin overdose, and the other was murdered. Holy moly roli poli oli – that shit be cray cray. Either way, she’s now here to write about her life, love, and all things nerd. I only have one more thing left to say … HIT IT LEAH!! </editorsnote>
As promised…. a blog about Valentine’s Day… Yippee!
I love holidays, like every holiday; especially if you can dress up, and for me that’s pretty much all of them. Christmas, Halloween, New Years, St. Patrick’s Day, Fourth of July… any chance to dress up in some sort of color coordinated clothing makes me happy. Really happy.
Valentine’s day of course.. is pink and red, and girlie bows, and socks with hearts on them… all sorts of colorful awesome things to choose from.
As a little girl, my Dad always made sure to not only honor my Mom with flowers and candy, and cards, but me and my sisters got gifts too. Always.
I’m a total romantic nerdy fool and I’ve always, always, loved love.
Until one year, I decided I didn’t.
After having my heart ripped out, stomped on, desecrated on, chewed up and spit out, one too many times, I decided Valentine’s day was the absolute god-awful, worst holiday ever known to man. And to show just how much I hated this holiday and the notion of finding one true romantic love, I made a pretty bold statement, in the form of a Photo Shoot.
I sought out this amazing photographer on www.modelmayhem.com , Evelyn DePaganel who was doing a calendar shoot, and I volunteered to be her Valentine’s model.
I travelled to New York, and we got down to business… creating, expressing, and capturing, the pain of this holiday for so, so, many people.
That was 2006.
And every year since then on Valentine’s Day, I change my profile photo to reflect the sorrow of this holiday.
Valentine’s Day 2010 perhaps being the worst of all; and one day, I will write about the circumstances leading up to it, but suffice it to say, that V-Day 2010, found me literally on the floor of my living room, shoving as many McDonald’s French Fries down my throat as I could, hoping and praying that I would simply choke on them. True Story.
Not long after that incident, I took a self-imposed year-long hiatus from Hollywood, to spend time in my hometown of Aston, PA (just outside of Philly), with my family.
Which brings us to the shift…?
Last year on Valentine’s Day, I literally felt something shift. Beings that I was ‘home’ recovering from all sorts of depression, exhaustion, and Hollywood fatigue, add to that fact that I am the only one of 5 siblings who is still single, I felt my entire family brace themselves for Valentine’s Day. I’m sure they were thinking I would be incredibly sad, that yet another year passed for me with no one (romantically) to share my love with. They all seemed to be tip-toeing around the subject, ready to offer warmth and console when the “day” arrived.
But you know what? I woke up on Valentine’s Day last year, and felt SO happy, and so much love for myself, it was like a cloud had just been lifted, and I was able to just enjoy the day and treat myself. I made an appointment at a fancy spa, using a gift certificate my parents had given me for Xmas, and after my day at the spa, (where I treated myself to a few extra treatments), I headed straight to the nail salon. And then, just as I was heading home, I recv’d an invite from my brother to come have dinner with him and his wife, and my parents at his house. Normally, I would have said no, hating the fifth-wheel syndrome, but instead I said yes, and I had a lovely Valentine’s meal with two amazing couples, who I happen to be related to.
The past year, has been spent continuing to heal my heart, continuing to battle the emotional binge eating I found myself involved in to compensate for the heart hurts, and I am really excited to say that this year, I am TOTALLY looking forward to Valentine’s Day. I bought myself a groupon to a spa, and afterwards I am attending a Valentine’s Day workshop at www.GoldenBrigeYoga.com, and after that, I have a really awesome girlfriend visiting from Nashville who has invited me to have a girl’s night slumber party at her upscale hotel. (Her hubby is back in Nashville, so I’m going to be her Valentine’s date).
I feel good… I feel happy.
I feel like… maybe, just maybe it’s true that time heals all wounds.
I feel ready to celebrate.
Happy Valentine’s Day to the entire Talk Nerdy To Me, Lover family… make it a good one, celebrate you!